


what if you were right the first time?

by kingyu (ifntae)



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-27 11:56:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15024071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifntae/pseuds/kingyu
Summary: Being friends with Woohyun is the one thing Sunggyu doesn't, and will never regret.Woohyun's is like waking up from a strange nightmare; like the sun, shining right over your face.





	what if you were right the first time?

#### X.

Sunggyu's lost in thought. Has been for a while, and will be for another.

It happened one day. The place he called home wasn't that anymore, perhaps it never was in the first place. It's not that something changed, he wouldn't say it did.

He's sitting in his chair, as usual.

There's a notebook full of unused lyrics under his fingertips, as usual.

He's there but not really. Sadly, as usual.

The AC is doing this annoying sound he's gotten used to hear whenever he's in the studio. It's too hard to ignore but he's too tired to even think about doing something about it.

So he doesn't.

Maybe it's that, he reckons.

Maybe it's that he's not even trying.

A knock on the door. He flinches, coming out of his own dark hole.

"Come in" His voice is raspy, unused for the last hours. Perhaps days.

Someone peaks their head in. The stranger looks young and lost, and it reminded him a little bit of himself. Just a few years back.

"I'm sorry" They say, "I got this letter for Kim Sunggyu."

He fixes himself on his chair. "That's me."

Sunggyu stares at the letter sitting over the notebook. Looks innocent, but for some reason, Sunggyu doubts it is. There's no return address, and his name as well as his company's address is sloppily written over a corner.

He doesn't recognise the writing. Not yet at least.

He opens the envelope, no longer ignorant of its content.

An accident. A mistake.

An accidentally mistake.

Oh.

_Oh._

 

#### VIII.

Woohyun's lips taste like a mixture of strawberry cocktails and blueberry vodka.

It's a strange combination, one that has Sunggyu over the edge as his tongue passes through them, savoring it a little bit more each time.

Their hands are all over each other's bodies. One moment he's tracing the hollow part of his waist, then he's tugging on the back of his neck, drawing out a deep moan from the other male. He feels Woohyun palming his asscheeks, then moving up to his shoulder blades.

The feeling is nice, it really is.

It's addicting, it's an open door, it's bubbling feelings in his chest, it's the beginning of something and the end of a book, all at the same time.

Sunggyu wonders how is it possible.

Wonders how did it take him this long to realise.  
  
Or did he always know?

They're so pressed to each other it almost hurts. It's not only that he's only aroused, it's not only the animalistic part of himself that is asking for Woohyun, that is yearning for what's about to happen.

"I love you" Woohyun whispers in his ear. Sunggyu sees sparks of light behind his eyelids.

He thinks _I love you too_.

But only thinks.

 

#### II.

Being friends with Woohyun is the one thing Sunggyu doesn't, and will never regret.

Woohyun's is like waking up from a strange nightmare; like the sun, shining right over your face.

His canine tooth. His bubbly laugh. His crescent eyes.

"Hyung," Woohyun calls, taking Sunggyu's hand in his.

The party's loud. It's messy. It's cramped with people moving around like an ant nest, stomping with each other's feets, pretending to like they're there.

Sunggyu doesn't like pretending, never has.

"Hyun," He says. His eyes stop on his jaw. On his lips. On the glint of his eyes and the fluttering eyelashes.

Woohyun's beer stops midway.

"Let's get out of here."

Woohyun smiles, and follows Sunggyu out until it's the two of them and the moon.  
  


#### XI.

When he comes back home, something is off.

Could it be the entrance door? It grinds against the asphalt when he's trying to open it, but then again, it always does.

Is it the weather? The app in his phone had notified him that it'd rain, so the grey clouds are no surprise.

Perhaps it's him, perhaps he's making it up in an attempt to keep his mind busy. Yeah. It must be that.

When he opens the door to his apartment, there's no one else to greet him in. He's not disappointed, but it suddenly makes him feel almost… dreadful. Which is weird, he can't recall a time when he's been greeted from he moment he stepped into his home.

_(Perhaps because it isn't)_

The plastic bag in his hand suddenly feels depressing, with its single apple and two bottle of beers.

He sighs, and shakes off his shoes at the entrance. One of them kick the piece of furniture besides him. A picture flies out.

When he picks it up, he squints his eyes to see two male figures in it. His eyesight isn't the best, and the lightning at the entrance isn't either, so he's forced to walk into the kitchen to see it better.

When he finally recognises the two figures, he drops the plastic bag, the two beers chattering inside.

It's him and Woohyun.

 

#### V.

"Sometimes I don't get you" Woohyun laughs, and Sunggyu wonders how much of truth is within the words.

The grass is tickling his torso and arms, but he focuses on staying still, feeling the warm rays of sun hitting over his body as he lies down.

It's some hour in the afternoon, Sunggyu has stopped checking the clock since a few weeks back. Somehow he thinks time isn't always right. What he didn't do yesterday could be done tomorrow, or perhaps in this exact moment. He doesn't believe there has to be one exact moment for things.

Woohyun is fidgeting besides him. He doesn't see it, it isn't necessary.

"What is it?" He asks.

Woohyun laughs again, this time it sounds fake, nervous. "Nothing."

On some other time (perhaps yesterday, or tomorrow) he'd press onto it, force Woohyun to tell him what's eating him inside. Right now, though, he prefers to stay under the sun, as they're, with each other's presence.

"Tell me more about Seoul."

Seoul.

"Seoul," He hums, "is the city of opportunities."

 

#### IV.

Woohyun's mad.

He doesn't know why Woohyun's mad. Should he?

But he is, and it's obvious that it's because of him.

He's trying to eat his lunch in peace, trying to focus on Howon's story. It's something about Dongwoo doing something that was amazing, and some other thing that happened afterwards that was _more_ amazing. Sunggyu's brain doesn't get the memo of what the other is really saying. Not when his eyes are fixed on the bull looking Woohyun who's stumping his way over him.

"Why did you do it, hyung?" Woohyun demands.

The table goes dead quiet.

Sunggyu chews on his sandwich. Did his mother add tomato?

"Why the fuck did you?!" Woohyun slams his palms against the table.

Howon raises up.

"Calm down, Hyun."

He wishes to be the one that's saying that.

"I'm fucking sick and tired of you." Woohyun confesses, and it sounds a bit too sincere, not like it's just a rage.

Woohyun isn't having it anymore, he knows. Yet he focuses on chewing.

Chewing.

It's until Woohyun has walked away and is far enough to not listen, that Howon sits down. And asks.

"What was that about?"

Sunggyu reaches for his juice box. His hands are shaking.

He did right.

"He deserved it." He says, and drinks.

 

#### IX.

Woohyun's panting under him. He's got his arms tangled around his neck, his fingertips tickling the back, touching over the purple spots that he's made himself.

Sunggyu's hitting that part in particular that makes Woohyun see stars, and he smirks at the expression.

"You like it?" He asks, and hopes it sounds sexy enough.

Woohyun's closing his eyes, firm and strong. He nods.

It looks out of place.

He stops moving.

"Does it hurt?"

Woohyun shakes his head, and forces him to lie closer to him, chest against chest. "Keep moving," he requests.

He does, but Woohyun doesn't change.

That's his charm, Sunggyu figures, that he never changes.

"Seriously, Hyun, does it hurt?"

Woohyun opens his eyes, red and with accumulated tears falling through the sides of his face.

_You hurt._

 

#### VI.

"You're doing an amazing work" His chief compliments.

For once, there's this effervescing feeling in his chest. He's felt it before, but not in a while. He's proud of himself, smiling cheekily and hoping to not be blushing too much.

The change of setting is something he needed, the new air, the new people. It's not perfect, Sunggyu knows, but it's something.

His chief is saying something. He's listening. He's focused. He's ready.

He's looking at his phone vibrating inside his open drawer.

_Woohyun._

He's possessive. He's ugly. He's someone he doesn't recognise nor wants to comprehend.

He shuts the drawer, and looks back up, smile not flickering, not even for a moment.

 

#### VII.

"I'm sorry," He cries and repeats, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry" as if it were a mantra.

There's snot running down his noise, and he's sobbing so hard and so loud he can't hear Woohyun on the other side of the line. Hopes the other hasn't hang up on him yet.

Hasn't lose faith.

"I don't know what the fuck's wrong with me" He confesses.

His knees hurt, because he's been kneeling down for far too long.

His head hurts, because he lost the count of beers and shots he drank earlier tonight.

His heart hurts, because—

Woohyun asks, "Where are you?" finally.

He spits out his address, and lies down on the cold tiles of the floor, waiting for Woohyun to arrive.

Waiting for his favorite angel to come to him, to forgive him, just like always.

 

#### XII.

"One ticket to Jeonju" Sunggyu requests.

The lady in the other side of the booth types something in her computer, and before she could even mutter a question, he's already sliding his credit card.

When he's got the ticket in his hands, there's only one thing for him to do.

Wait.

He thinks he's good at it, perhaps it's the only thing he's _really_ good at.

The one thing he's not good at?

Do.

 

#### III.

Sunggyu's seeing red.

He's never been angry. At least not this much.

He compares his past experiences with anger, and they seem like a pathetic little spark of light compared with the house on fire that he represents right now.

The boy's before him is bleeding. He's looking up at Sunggyu with confusion, perhaps getting angry too.

"What th—"

Sunggyu kicks his stomach. His legs, his face. His knuckles are bleeding but it's nothing compared to the choking blood that's coming from the boy's mouth.

"You say one more thing about Woohyun—" He starts, and is about to kick him again, but the boy flinches.

Pathetic.

Stupid.

Sunggyu thinks of Woohyun. Of his smile. Of the happiness that comes with him wherever he goes.

Then he thinks of that happiness being stolen away from someone as pathetic and hypocrite as the tembling mess over the ground.

He doesn't deserve Woohyun.

 _He_ doesn't deserve Woohyun.

"Stay fucking away from him."

He spits and walks away, calming himself and thinking about a certain light.

 

#### XIII.

The taxi drops him off outside of Woohyun's home.

Nothing's really change.

Perhaps the color of the little house isn't as bright as before, and the swim on the side looks a little neglected, but the sight before him is mostly the same. He breathes in, and out. He could almost swear it also smells like before, like his childhood memories.

He rings the doorbell, knocks on the door. He's impatient, nervous. He's unsure, regretful.

"Coming" A voice answers from inside, and Sunggyu steps down the few treads, strolling around Woohyun's front yard. He looks over where Woohyun cut his arm once when they were little, remembers the afternoon he spent in the other's living room, comforting him until his mother would come back.

He hears the front door open, and turns around smiling, ready to—.

Oh.

"Who is it?" Woohyun asks.

He's smiling.

His eyes are opened, almost as if looking at Sunggyu.

_Almost._

"Is there anybody out there?" Woohyun asks again, tugs a little bit harder on his white support cane.

The sun's at it's best point, shining bright over Sunggyu's features.

Sunggyu drops to his knees, and cries.

He can't believe it, he just can't.

Woohyun's smile flickers, and as if he knew those crying sounds by heart, he asks, "Sunggyu?"

Sunggyu nods between his ugly sobs, and knows Woohyun _can't_ see it, so he answers,

 

#### I.

"It's me." The boy says, raising up and lifting his arm a little.

Sunggyu frowns from the room's door. "You're Woohyun?"

"Uhu" Woohyun nods, and sits back down. "Thank you for coming."

He scoffs, not pulling out the hands from his pockets.

"Let's make this quick."

Half an hour later, Woohyun still doesn't understand how to divide numbers.

"How can you be this stupid?" Sunggyu's words are harsh, but he doesn't really mean them, and Woohyun laughs. Could it be that he knows?

Woohyun hums, "yeap, I am."

He closes the math book and puts it back into his backpack. Sunggyu stares at him through it, almost not believing it.

"Wanna grab some lunch?"

Sunggyu wants to say some nasty things, tell him that he should be focusing more on his future, on what's going to happen tomorrow, next year, the next decade— but realizes he doesn't care much himself.

Woohyun must've heard the rumors. Who hasn't? Who doesn't know Sunggyu around here?

But he's smiling. He's inviting him to eat.

He's starting something.

"Yeah," he answers without thinking, without knowing that this decision will reflect in his entire life, like some butterfly effect shit he read the other day in one of the books in the library, "let's go grab some lunch."

"Kim Sunggyu," Woohyun calls when they're eating. Sunggyu's got half of his roll inside his mouth. Just finished complaining about something he swore Woohyun wouldn't like.

But he's here.

He's stayed.

"Life's gonna come and bite you in the ass." He jokes.

He laughs.

Woohyun laughs.

Yeah, perhaps.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> now read it in order I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII - VIII - IX - X - XI - XII - XIII
> 
> if this mess is still not clear, please hmu. 
> 
>  
> 
> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/kingyu)  
> [tw](https://twitter.com/sinagyu)


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